Went back to NP today, to meet my friends, Mark and XueFen.
Going back there brings back a lot of good memories, I miss those days in school.
Talking about plants also made me happy,
I guess it really lighten me up, from all the emo-ness that I am inflicting on myself.

Mark said I was expecting too much for my NS life.
Maybe I was, maybe I should just let it go, and finish it.
But I couldn't, it's not that I don't like the camp,
I prioritize my interests over the benefits that I am getting.
I would rather feel tired from doing something that I enjoy doing,
rather than getting tired doing stuff that I don't like at all,
and helping other people do work that they can't finish.

I feel more tired in the latter, because my mind couldn't focus on what I am doing.
Even though my workload was mangeable (quite slack I would say)
and I had to cover up for someone elses'
because he is incompetent, and everyone refuses to let him do the job.
Everything eventually went down to me.
In the first place, why is he here? And why put me here?

I don't know..now I feel lethargic going to camp these days.


XueFen went to enrol for University of Queensland, Bachelor in Applied Science.
And I found out that the school fees per annum is a whooping $38,000.
If I were to go, where am I suppose to get the money?
And it's not even inclusive of accommodation and travelling costs.


I am tired......why am I feeling so tired everytime...?